Songs from the Heart – Chapter 3

Sometime later after we got to the waiting lunge, a man came in calling Liam’s name “Liam Payne, Liam Payne, you’re up next.” I could see Liam tense up, my heart skipped a beat, I was terribly nervous for him. I out my hand on his knee lightly, “it’s going to be alright.” I said “it’s just me and you up there, forever together.” I said using Liam’s words to comfort him. Liam and I got up together and walked over towards the ma.

“Liam Payne?” the man asked

“That would be me,” Liam said sounding confident.

The Payne family and I walked through the long hallway silently as if this was it, as if this is what would determine everything, and  it was.

———

Dekotas POV:

When the  security man came to get Liam the girls and I went to get our seats in the audience, carrying our posters with us. Clarissa was still smiling from her incident with the Irish bloke, what was his nam? Oh, right Niall, yes his name was Niall. He was quite a fit bloke, with an adorable accent, but not my type.

We got our seat, which were quite close up to the stage so Liam would see us; we were his personal support system. I felt my hand vibrate, I looked down and saw my phone screen light up with a message picture on it. I opened the txt to see it was Nikki. “You guys seated yet?”

“Yah,” I responded

“Good” Nikki answered quickly

“How’s he holding up?” I asked. I could tell Liam was quite nervous, but I didn’t want to intrude on his personal space.

“he’s quite nervous” Nikki wrote back with a :/ face.

“Let him know we believe in him”

“I will after”

“Why?” I asked confused

“It’ll be too much pressure”

“Alright” I said understanding

————-

Liam’s POV

“Well I don’t have to ask who you are,” Jim said. (A/N: I changed his name because I didn’t know what it was) Jim was here when I auditioned for the x-factor in 2008. “How are you man?”

“Wonderful thanks?”

“It’s great to see you back!” Jim said with a massive smile.

“Great to be beck,” I said smiling.

“Well, you’re a bit broader and a bit deeper as well.” Jim said grabbing my shoulders and shaking them a bit. I laughed, I had always liked Jim; he made me feel so comfortable. “Well, here we go man, good luck!”

“Thanks” I said before I climbed up the stairs to the stage.

The audience cheered as I walked on stage, perhaps remembering me, and that made me smile. I looked at the judges and saw Cheryl pointed at me saying something to Simon so he would look at me and he did I think he was a bit shocked to see me back. “Liam,” Simon said raising his hand to get my attention, as if it wasn’t on him already.

“How are doing Simon, you alright?” I said into the mic smiling.

“How you doing? I’ve been well,” Simon responded smiling. “Two years, yeah?”

“Two years, yah, two years,” I said my nerves calming a bit, but I was still quite nervous.

“How far did you get last time Liam,” Louis asked me in his Irish accent.

“Well, I was here in 2008 and I made it into Simon’s house in Barbados.” I said with confidence to Louis.  Simon looked at his papers shuffling about with them.

“What at are you going to sing today?” Simon said still looking at his papers.

“Urm, I’m going to sing Cry Me a River,” I looked at the judges seeking their reactions.

“Ok,” Louis said smiling, so I got ready. I swallowed my fears, now wasn’t the time for that, now is the time to show the world what I have inside of me, now is my time to make my mark. The familiar tune of Cry Me a River came on and I knew that was my cue to sing.

“Now you say you’re lonely,” I belted out with all I had. The crowed went wild, so I gave it all I had, putting all my emotions in.

“You cry the whole night trough,

Well, you can cry me a river,

Cry me a river,” Simon seemed utterly impressed with my so far, for that I was proud.

I cried a river over you.” This was the part I had to nail, if I didn’t get this part I was screwed, I let it come to me.

“Now you say you love me,” I nailed it! I nailed it! I smiled with all I had, and I could see the judges were impressed.

“Well, just to prove that you do,

Come on and cry me a river,

Oooh, cry me a river,

I cried a river over you,

Cry me a river.” my body was shaking, I realized what I had just done, what I had just accomplished and then I saw two judges standing up for me while the crowed went mad. Simon and Paula were standing, I was ecstatic. As the judges sat down, the crowed died down.

“You’ve definitely got it, whatever it is that you’ve got it” Cheryl said

“Thank you Cheryl,” I said smiling taking the compliment to heart.

“And I thought your voice was really, really powerful” Cheryl finished.

“That was really impressive, really, really impressive” Paula said sincerely

“Thank you very much.”

“And I think other people in this competition should be a bit worried about you.” Paula concluded

“Haha, thank you,”

“You’re really good,” Paula was making me feel amazing; she was giving me a tremendous amount of compliments.

“I’m really glad that you came back,” Louis said “it was a brilliant, brilliant vocal, and for someone sixteen years it was so confident. You totally delivered it.” I listened intently to Louis while he commended me. “Simon,” Louis said turning to Simon “this is the guy you didn’t put through!” I looked at Simon as did the whole room. I inhaled, quite nervous about Simon’s response.

“He wasn’t quite ready when he came to my house two years ago, but I said to him then; come back two years’ time and you’re going to be a different person. I got it right.”  I exhaled relived that he enjoyed my performance.

“Now were going to vote,” Louis said to me, he paused still looking at me and then said “I am going to say yes.” I smiled showing him how overjoyed I was.

“Thank you so much” I said delighted.

“It’s a yes from me” Natalie said. I nodded my thanks.

“It’s a yes from me, definitely” Cheryl said

“Simon, yes or no,” Louis said. Simon looked at me, my heart dropped, my worst fears surfaced.

“Based on talent, absolutely incredible, one massive, fat, almighty yes”

I was shocked, I was so happy I clenched my hands flexing my arms as the crowd cheered. I walked off the stage elated. When I walked off the stage the first person I saw was Nikki, standing there smiling her imperfect, yet perfect smile. “I knew it she mouthed to me. I winked at her as my family wrapped me in their loving embraces.

“The boy becomes a man, congratulations,” Jim said grabbing the back of my neck giving me a manly hug. “How are you feeling?”

“Really good” I said “I really enjoyed that. I have been waiting two years to get up there and do that and now it’s just-”

“You could just see that frustration-”

“Coming out, yeah” I finished for Jim. He knew how I felt, and I really had been waiting all this time just for that.

Nikki was standing right in front of me, smiling so proud. “Thank you” I said as I hugged her.

“Don’t thank me, I was just doing my job.” We hugged again before leaving the x factor house.

——-

Nikki’s POV

My phone was buzzing like mad. I got texts from Mum, Taylor, Dekota, Kayla, Clarissa and Shay.

“Tell Liam I’m so proud of him” Mom’s txt said. My mum had always been like another mum to Liam. I opened Dekotas txt which said, “OMG! You were right! He totally nailed it!”

“Told ya” I wrote back quickly before opening Taylor’s text.

“Tell Liam he was AMAZING! We have to celebrate tonight.”

“He is officially my idol” Kayla said. I smiled at that, knowing she meant it.

“Hey Liam, guess what?” I asked him.

“What?”

“You are officially Kayla’s idol”

“Sweet,” Liam said “tell her it’s an honor.”

“Alright” I said before texting her Liam’s words.

“He was awesome! So happy I came” Clarissa wrote.

“Because of Niall?” I asked with a smiley face.

“You’re horrid!” She wrote back with a winking face.

I opened Shay’s text “I was watching x factor, was that your friend Liam on there?”

“Yeah,” I wrote back.

“He was awesome! Tell him I’m rooting for him.”

“Will do” I wrote back and I told him.

Songs from the Heart – Chapter 2

“What does it say?” I asked Clarissa as her cheeks flushed pink.

“He asked me if I wanted to hang out sometime.”

“Yay!” I said doing a little happy dance.

“Thanks,” Clarissa said giving me a quick hug.

“You’re welcome Rissa!” I said smiling happily. All the girls came to see that was going on. “Rissa got a date with Niall!” I said grinning wildly.

“Yay!” Kayla said pumping her fist into the air. We were pretty much all pumped about it, Rissa was going out. We always showed each other amazing support when we one of us would get asked out.

“It’s NOT a date guys, he just want to hang out.” Clarissa said getting embarrassed.

“Seems like a date to me,” said Dekota as she snatched Clarissa’s phone away. Clarissa protested but it didn’t help the girls clearly didn’t want to give it back and I had a feeling Clarissa wasn’t going to be able to get it back from them any time soon.

“Ok, while you guys decide if it’s actually a date or not I’m going to give my friend moral support.” I said before walking over to Liam who looked like he was horribly nervous. “Its gona be ok,” I said rubbing Liam’s back.

“What if I forget the song?” Liam asked as he leaned his head on me.

“No you won’t” I said firmly “you’ll do an amazing job.” Liam looked at me with analytical eyes and the he smiled.

“What?” I said cocking my head to the side.

“Thanks for being so supportive of me.” Liam said before lightly kissing me on my cheek. My heart fluttered, “what the hell?” I thought “I don’t have feelings for Liam so why did I just get butterflies?” I decided to brush it off, thinking nothing of it.

“That’s what best friends are for.” I said suddenly having an evil thought. I grabbed Kayla’s extra spoon she had brought with her and stuck it right in front of Liam’s face.

“Ahh!” Liam said pushing my hand away, but avoiding the spoon.

“Never!” I said cornily before cracking up with Liam. Liam’s Mum told us to ‘hush’ but we didn’t listen. I ran after Liam with my spoon knowing that while he ran he wouldn’t be thinking about singing. We finally finished our little marathon and came back to a slightly pissed off Kayla. “Sorry,” I said as I handed her the spoon “the temptation was just too much.”

“ ‘s ok,” she said “but take your coffee.”

I took my coffee cup from her which was surprisingly still more on the hot side, just how I like it. Then I handed Liam his cup, we clicked them together, said cheers and drank.

“So whacha gona sing?” Dekota asked Liam striking up a conversation.

“Cry Me a River.” Liam said smiling as he sipped from his cup.

“Oooo, that’s quite hard,” Dekota said sympathetically.

“Yah but he’s been practicing for quite a long time so he’ll be amazing,” I said patting Liam on the back.

“You better be, I’m rooting for you” Dekota said with a wink. Liam chuckled nervously fidgeting with the fringe of his sweater.

“Drink,”  I ordered him, and of course he drank.

Suddenly, two large men dressed in black approached us.

“You first in line?” the bigger one said in a gruff voice.

“yeah,” liam said straightening up looking taller and more manly.

“Were going to let everyone in, just follow us,”

“Alright,” Liam’s Mum said taking charge of the group. We said bye to the girls who went to the front giving Liam there best of luck.  Liam and I walked together in the back of the group. “I can’t let them down again.” Liam whispered to me.

“You won’t,” I said firmly.

“But what if I don’t get through?” Liam argued.

“Liam, we love you even if you don’t win.” I told him softly.

“I just…I don’t want what happened two years ago to happen again.” Looking at Liam, seeing his face, reminded me of the time Liam got a “bad” mark on his test.

“Remember when we were little and you scored a ninety on your science test? I asked Liam, he nodded remembering. “You were going mental, you were so scared to tell your parents because you though they would be disappointed but they weren’t, they were so proud of you and treated the ninety as if it were a hundred.” I looked up at Liam who was smiling at the memory.

“I made you come with me to tell them because I couldn’t face them alone.”  Liam looked at me with his big brown eyes. My heart fluttered “stop it Nikki!” I scolded myself silently.

“I’m here, were facing this together, you and me, like always.” Liam nodded hugging me tightly squeezing me tightly at the end.

“Forever together,” Liam said smiling his warm smile.

“Yes,” I nodded “forever together.”

Songs from the Heart – Chapter 1 (a one direction fan fiction)

The line was absolutely ludacris!  It was so long, too long for this early in the morning. “I have to wait through all this?” I thought warily. I could already imagine my feet by the end of the day, but he was my best friend, I was here to support him. I looked at my previous messages on my phone “go to the front” it said. I scanned the area, “the front” I thought scanning the area. There were so many people, how could I know where the front was? Then I saw it all the way across the lot where the absolutely insane line started.  I decided to surprise him so I sneaked up behind him motioning everyone to stay silent about my approach. “Boo!” I yelled grabbing his waist from behind.

“Ahh!” Liam yelled “Nikki! What the hell?”

“Sorry” I said cheekily “I just had to! So how long have you guys been waiting out here?” I asked the rest of Liam’s family

“A long time,” Liam’s Mum said before embracing me tightly like she always does.

“It’s so damn cold!” I said shivering and getting closer to Liam.

“Come here,” he said as he pulled me into a tight and warm hug.

“Mmmm,” I said my body getting warmer. I buried my head into Liam’s chest feeling his warmth.

Liam and I were best friends since moved next door to me, we didn’t go to the same school but that didn’t lessen our friendship it only made us stronger.

“So,” I said pulling my head back slightly from Liam’s chest so that I could see his face. “When do the doors of doom open?” I asked cheekily.

“At seven ‘o clock,” Liam said as he txted someone.

“Who the hell is up now that your texting them at this ungodly hour?” I asked glancing at his phone.

“My Dad,” Liam said smiling sadly looking down.

“Couldn’t make it?” I asked him. He looked at me then looked at his phone and then back at me.

“No,” he said before shaking his head. “He had a last minute emergency at work.” I could tell it affected him a lot. Liam had a strong connection with his father, even as a child, what Liam’s father thought about him made him think twice about everything.

“You know,” I said softly as if I was talking to a child who just got hurt “he really wanted to be here, you heard him talking about it and how proud he is that you have the guts to go back on again.” Liam auditioned for X factor in 2009, now its 2011, two years later he is back per Simon Cowell’s instructions. Simon was his previous mentor, he got as far as the second round at Simon’s house in Barbados when Simon told him he wouldn’t go further but rather, he should wait two more years, and return in two years.

“I know,” Liam said “I know.”

I poked Liam in the stomach lightly; “hey!” he said play smacking me on the arm.

“What was that for?” I asked a little too innocently.

“Seriously?” Liam asked me. I felt a buzzing in my right back pocket. “Who’s texting you at this ungodly hour?” Liam asked mimicking my voice, winking and flashing his perfect cheeky grin.

I pulled out my phone making a face at him. The screen read Taylor “you there yet?” I slid my finger across the screen of my phone unlocking it.

“Ya, are you coming?” I wrote back.

“we stopped at Prufrock, want some?” Taylor replied.

“ya the usual” I wrote knowing Taylor would understand. “Does anyone want something from Prufrock?” I asked the Payne family.

“A cappuccino would be lovely, thanks” Liam said suddenly looking a bit tiered.

“Thanks, but no thanks,” Liam’s Mom said I knew Nicole and Ruth, Liam’s sisters wouldn’t want and I didn’t want to disturb their conversation.

“and a cappy for liam”  I quickly txted Taylor.

“alright be there in 20” read the response.

Last night Taylor, Dekota, Kayla and Clarissa, my best friends from secondary school, slept over s we could make massive support posters for Liam. The girls really didn’t know Liam, except for Taylor, but they came anyway.

Twenty minutes of teasing and yawning later my phone buzzed with a message from Clarissa, “were here, were are you?”

“front of the line” I wrote back knowing it was vague but also knowing that Clarissa was very capable of finding her way.

I turned too Liam smiling cheekily, he took one look at me and said “what did you do?”

“I have a surprise!” I said looking at him as if I was a child. Liam’s eyes grew wide; I turned around to look at what he was staring at. I ran as fast as I could towards her, scanning the area for the rest of them ‘where are they?’ I thought still running. “Rissa, are you ok?” I asked as I let myself fall to where her body lay.

Clarissa nodded her head at me wincing as she moved her arm, “I think so,” she sat up.

“I’m terribly sorry,” said a thick Irish voice. I looked up to see a guy about 16 with blond hair.

‘Deffo Irish’ I thought.

“are you ok?” he asked leaning down a bit.

“I think so,” Clarissa repeated attempting to stand up.  The rest of the girls came, worried out of their minds. “Are you ok?” Kayla asked. “Can you stand?”Dekota said frantically. “Does anything hurt?” Taylor said concerned.

“I’m ok,” Clarissa said  attempting to answer all of them at once.

All of the sudden Liam came out of nowhere grabbing Clarissa’s for arm along with the Irish bloke pulling her to her feet.

“I am so sorry,” Irish said again looking at Clarissa worriedly.

“I’m ok, really” Clarissa insisted

“I’m Niall,” Irish said sticking out his hand blushing a bit.

“Clarissa,” Clarissa said blushing as well.

“You trying out today?” Niall asked Clarissa.

“Nah, I’m here to support,” Clarissa said smiling shyly.

“Surprise!” I said raising my eyebrows as if to say “woops!” Liam laughed shaking his head, I could imagine him saying “Fail!”

Irish, or Niall turned to Liam and said “you going on?”

“Yeah,” Liam said getting a little shy. “Second year back.”

“Really?” Niall said “oh! I know you! You were on in 2009 right, Liam was it?”

“Ya that was me.”

“I was rootin’ for ya, I wanted you to go farther than Barbados, sorry it didn’t happen.” Naill said rambling.

“yah, thanks” Liam said the Barbados was a sore subject with him.

“Hi, I’m Nikki” I said smiling at Niall, “we have should get back” I said pointing behind me.

“Ok,” Niall said “nice meeting you guys, and sorry about that Clarissa”

“no worries,” Clarissa said giggling.

“Good luck,” Liam said to Niall.

“Good luck to you as well” Niall said smiling.

We went back to our spot talking about music and making light conversation. Clarissa still had a light flush to her face.

 

“He was cute!” I said bumping Clarissa’s arm lightly to get her attention.

“Mhm,” Clarissa smiled shyly.

“Get his number!” I said not understanding how she didn’t realize he liked her.

“If you don’t, I will!” I said determined to make it happen. “Oh God!” I said walking away, heading towards Niall. He was standing with his family. “Niall?” I said tapping him on the shoulder.

“Yeah?” Niall said turning his head to me.

“Can I get your number?” I asked “for Clarissa” I hurried to add.

“Oh, yah,” Niall said, the confused look leaving from his face before rambling off his number. “Do you want hers?” I asked cocking my head to the side.

“Oh, yah!” Niall said his face lighting up.

“She’s kind of shy,” I said as I gave him her number.

“Thanks,” Niall said smiling shyly.

“Hope to see you around!” Niall said cheerily.

I waved and walked back to my group. Liam was staring at me with a weird face that I couldn’t read. “What’s up?” I asked him.

“Where’d you go?” Liam asked.

“To get Niall’s number,” I said watching his expression, his face got hard, his hands clenched into fists. Suddenly I had a weird thought but I pushed it down. Liam and I were best friends, he loved me but he wasn’t in love with me. Why did I have such a weird thought? Where did it come from?

“Why?” Liam said stepping closer his expression suddenly softening.

“For Clarissa,” I said  “hey, Rissa!” I said waving Clarissa over “come here.”

“You got it?” she asked her face lighting up.

“Yup” I said before telling her the number “and I gave him yours,” I said grinning.

“You think he’ll message me?” Clarissa asked.

“I do,” I said giggling as Clarissa’s phone buzzed letting her know she got a txt. Looking at the screen her face flushed a light pink, I knew it was Niall.

Never the Same – Chapter 5 – New Beginnings (to be continued)

“You guys are partners right?” James asked both of us.

“Yeah,” Aasher said smiling at me. “Right partner?” he asked, my heart skipped yet another beat.

Two guys are standing in front of me. One guy my current boyfriend and soon to be ex-boyfriend. As well as a gorgeous guy who I’m going to away with to spend a good part of my year being partners with him, and James isn’t acting like a jerk like many other guys would. I knew no matter what I was going to Australia but I was going to be leaving James behind to care for him mother while I was having fun. I realized I had been so lost in thought they had started a conversation. “Take care of her.” James said “don’t let anyone hurt her, ever” James said with emphasis on ever.

“No worries man I got her.”  Aasher said patting James on the back to reassure him.

“Thanks man, I owe you one.” James said before handing Aasher my bag he was holding.  Aasher took my bag, shifting his own things to carry mine. James, Abriana, Tina and I said our final good byes before I had to board the plane.

“You know, I could carry my own bag,” I said turning to look at Aasher.

“I know,” Aasher said simply flashing his amazing smile at me.

“Ok,” I said simply.

On the plane Aasher and I sat first class because my ticket was first class and no one was sitting next to me. Sitting first class was not something I asked for, it was Michel’s. He had refused to pay for a coach seat, he had said he only wanted me to have the best and this was the best ticket, and this was the best.

“You excited for Australia?” Aasher asked turning his face towards me. I looked at him, trying to figure him out.

“I guess, I mean I’ve never been, so I don’t really know what to expect.”

“It’s amazing there, this is my second year going back with THT, I loved it.”

‘Is this guy for real? Someone pinch me!’ I thought.

“Wow,” I said “that so nice.”

Suddenly a voice came over the intercom. “Hello, this is Captain Fergazo speaking, Co-Captain Emeren and I will be at your service for this flight, we hope you have a peaceful and enjoyable experience flying with us,” said the voice, supposedly Captain Fergazo. After the flight attendants gave their ceremonial instructions about safety and everything we needed to know in case of an emergency, we prepared for take-off.

“Since were going to be partners for this entire trip shouldn’t we know a bit about each other? Especially if you so something stupid like, I don’t know…drown in the Great Barrier Reef?” I asked Aasher nudging him to get his attention.

“What? Oh, yeah,” he said grinning “where do you wana start?”

“Let’s play 20 questions” I said

“How do you play?” Aasher asked. I looked at him in mock shock.

“Seriously?” I said

“Yup” Aasher answered confidently.

“Ok,” I said sighing. “The rules are: I ask you a question and then you ask me a question, you MUST answer the question no matter what and you can’t ask me the same questions until the round of 20 questions are up. Usually you start with stupid questions and you work your way up, if you know what I mean.”

“Alright,” Aasher said “I’m ready for anything ya got.”

“You sure?” I asked putting on my best poker face.

“Positive,” Aasher said confidently.

“What’s your last name?” I asked

“Jennings.”

“What’s your favorite color?” Aasher said cocking his head to the side as if he asked a really important question. I giggled at how serious he looked

“Black, purple, red and blue.”

“What’s your favorite band?”

“Well, I have a lot but one that I just found out about is The Wanted, there really good.”

“Yeah, I love their songs! I downloaded them to my Ipod!”

“Awesome! We’re going to get along really well” Aasher said winking.

“What’s your favorite holiday?”

“Christmas” I said smiling.

“What’s your favorite food?”

“Ummm, Ice cream” Aasher said grinning.

“What’s your favorite movie?”

“I have a few so bear with me; A Walk to Remember-“

“Ok, hold up,” Aasher said “why do all girls like that movie?”

“Did you see it?” I asked

“Nope,”

“Ok that’s going on our to-do list.” I said before continuing with my list. “Umm..ok”

(To be continued…)

Never the Same – Chapter 4 – Getting Acquainted

When we got to the airport it was not that packed, of course there were people there but not as many as during vacation. Sharon and Michel didn’t come with us because I wouldn’t have been able to handle it, it would have been too much. “Don’t worry Hunny, we get it, don’t we Sharon,” Michel said while looking at Sharon.

“Yah, don’t worry, we get it,” Sharon said agreeing with Michel while hugging me. I hugged her back and then hugged Michel thinking that I was the luckiest girl because I had parents who really cared about me and put what was necessary for me before what they wanted. My mind traveled back to when I was three when a woman came to me and told me I was being taken to a lovely home, I remember being scared, I couldn’t remember much of anything else.

I couldn’t handle them being there, saying good bye to them along with Tina, James and Abriana, it would have almost killed me. I loved them all so much and I couldn’t handle the pain of the realization that I was really broke up with James and I couldn’t handle that he wasn’t going to be coming with me after all we planned to do together. I don’t blame him or  Marie for any of this, I didn’t blame anyone for this which made it even harder to come to terms with .

James was sitting next to me as I drove with Abriana and Tina sitting in the back giggling about the cute boy in the car adjacent to us. “I heard the weather there is awesome right now,” James said smiling his adorable smile.

“Yah the weathers like messed up there like its hot there now,” I said grinning back at him, it was like the old times where we would sit and talk about anything and be content. “How’s your Mom?” I asked sincerely.

“Ok, I guess, but still getting weaker, she’s going to have her surgery soon like in a month.”

“A month? I said “why not sooner?”

“That’s when it’s safest to do it,” James said softly

“Oh,” I said simply. A commercial came on so I asked James to switch the stations.

“Sure which one” James asked me fiddling with the knob

“102.7!” Tina announced from the back

“102.7 it is!” James said trying to match Tina’s happy tone.

“Don’t even try,” I said smirking at James, he smirked back at me raising an eyebrow.

“Um James?” Tina said laughing

“Yah?” James said turning his head to face Tina.

“On your right there’s a girl just drooling at you, but don’t look” Tina said trying to contain her laughter. Of course James being curious looked anyways. I turned to see who the mystery girl was and saw she was quite young.

“James wave at her,” I said smiling as James lifted his hand to wave.

“Hi” he mouthed. The girl waved back and that’s when Abriana burst out laughing as well. Thank god the light changed to green and we were able to go.

After about thirty more insane minutes of driving, singing and dancing in our seats we arrived at the LAX. “Were here!!!!” Tina yelled out.

“Tina, we know,” James said pretending to be mad at her before poking her in the stomach

“Hey!” Tina said smacking James. ‘Just like the old times’ I thought sadly feeling something weird in the pit of my stomach.

After parking my car we all got out and got my luggage out. “Geez, what did you pack in here?” James said taking out my heaviest luggage.

“That was them,” I said pointing to Abriana and Tina in mock accusation.

“What? Us? No! Were innocent!” they said in unison trying to look as innocent as they could.

“In a million years!” I said laughing along with them as I pulled small luggage walking alongside them.

After getting through all the security we were finally able to get to the boarding station, I saw a group of teens sitting together with someone who looked like a guide or a counselor, he got up and walked over to us. “Hello,” he said smiling “my name is Tim are you guys part of THT?”

“Hi,” I said returning the smile “I am but they’re not” I said  shaking Tim’s outstretched hand while gesturing to Tina Abriana and James.

“Hey,” James said extending his hand out to shake Tim’s as well.

“Well it’s great to have you,” Tim said smiling a perfect smile. “Let’s get you over to the group.”

“Hey, guys can I get your attention for a second?” Tim said putting his hand up. Once everyone was quiet Tim introduced me saying; “this is….” Tim looked at me with a puzzled face I’’m sorry I didn’t catch your name.” Tim said apologetically

“Aud” I said smiling

“I trust you guys will fill her in on what’s going to happen and such.” Tim said before sitting down letting everyone know he  was done the introduction.

One girl got up and started making her way towards me. “Hi,” she said smiling “my name is Juliet.”

“Hi,” I said smiling “This is James, Abriana and Tina.”

“Are they coming as well?” Juliet asked curiously

“No,” I said there just coming to see me off.

“Cool,” Juliet said smiling

“So, you want me to fill you in?” Juliet said as we started to move to sit down.

“Yah, that would be great” I said gratefully to her.

“Come sit over here,” Juliet said gesturing to where she was sitting before

“Ok” I said a bit overwhelmed at how welcoming she was.

“Ok so the rules Mr. Gold was talking about”

“Wait, Mr? Like everyone is supposed to call him that?” I asked baffled

“Yah, why?” Juliet asked

“Nothing” I said “you were saying?” I said moving the conversation back to the rules

“So you need a buddy to sit with on the plane, I would sit with you but I already have a partner”

“That’s ok,” I said

Suddenly I looked up and saw Tim talking to a gorgeous guy, he was like God kissed gorgeous. “Wow” Juliet said amazed.

“What?” I said pretending not to be fazed.

“That guy is gorgeous! I hope he is coming with us.” I looked around at th other girls, they were looking at him as well.

“Freaking gorgeous!” Tina agreed as Abriana nudged me. I looked at her as she raised her eyebrows as if to say “what do you think?” I glanced at James and then back at her. She realized her mistake and muttered sorry.

“It’s ok,” I whispered to her.

“Hey guys!?!?” Tim said trying to get our attention again. “Guys this is Aasher.”

“Hey,” Aasher said seeming a bit shy.

“Why don’t you go sit with Aud and…” Tim looked a bit confused.

“Juliet,” Juliet said.

“Ah, yes Juliet, sorry,” Tim said

“Thanks,” Aasher said smiling a lopsided grin.

“Seems nice enough,” James said quietly to me.

“Hey, I’m Aasher,” Aasher said “can I sit here?” pointing at a spot next to me.

“Yah, hi, I’m Aud, this is James, Tina, Abriana, and Juliet.” I said pointing at each one of them.

“So you guys are all part of the program?” Aasher asked.

“Not them,” I said pointing to James, Tina and Abriana. “There just here to see me off.”

“That’s sweet,” Aasher said flashing his lopsided grin again.

“Yeah,” I said feeling so lucky to have the great friends I did.

“So,” Aasher said “is there anything I need to know about this trip?”

“Well I had just started explaining everything to Aud so you can join in as well,” Juliet said smiling at Aasher.

“If it’s not a burden,” Aasher said.

“That’s so sweet!” I thought smiling.

“Nah, it’s totally cool” Juliet said. “First thing, which Aud already knows is, you need a buddy to sit with and take care of on the plane, bus, and all the time we are in Australia.” Juliet smiled like she had an idea. “How about since you two don’t have partners, you guys pair up?” Juliet asked.

I glanced at James who seemed cool with it but sensed my hesitation said, “Hey, and look at that! Now yah got a partner!” I smiled silently thanking him for being so supportive.

“Sure,” Aasher said looking at me for approval. “If it’s ok with you.”

“Yeah, sure” I confirmed smiling at Aasher.

“Perfect!” Tina said clapping her hands together happily, Abriana and I laughed at her.

“Aren’t you just the cheerleader!?” James teases her.

I felt someone walk up behind me, “Hey guys!” I looked up and saw a very pretty guy. “Hey,” we all said. “Miky, sit!” Juliet said pretending to order Miky. “Hi guys I’m Miky,” he said smiling.

“This is Aud,” Juliet said pointing to me “and these are her friends “James, Abriana, and Tina, there here to see her off.” She said as she pointed to them as well, “and this is Aasher.”

“Hey man,” James said fist pumping Miky. “Hey,” Miky responded.

“Hey,” Aasher said fist pumping Miky as well.

Suddenly a woman’s voice came over the intercom, “flight 204 is now boarding, flight 204 is now boarding.”

“That’s us,” Tom said indicating for us to start getting in line to board.

“Will the THT group please proceed to the front?” The woman’s voice continued.

“Let’s go,” Juliet said getting up first. We all followed, grabbing our bags.

“Here let me help you,” Aasher said grabbing a bag I had trouble holding.

“Thanks,” I said smiling at him.

“Ok well I guess we should go,” James said pouting a bit.

“Ok,” I said not the least bit excited about it.

“Come here,” Abriana said pulling me into an extremely tight hug. “I love you,” she said sounding sad.

“I love you too,” I said feeling tears in my eyes.

“Be careful out there ok?” Abriana said.

“It’s not the wild!” I said laughing as tears formed in my eyes. It felt wrong to have sad tears and laugh.

“I know,” Abriana said giggling as she wiped the tears from her face. “Anyways, looks like you got yourself a bodyguard!” she said wiggling her eyebrows and glancing at Aasher.

“So not,” I said looking over at him talking to James.

“Well see about that,” Abriana said smiling like she was a genius. “Anyways Mom wanted me to, well actually made me promise to tell you that she loves you and you have to call when you land, ok?”

“Ok” I said hugging her again.

“Aud,” Tina said coming over from where Miky and Juliet were talking. I opened my arms to hug her, she squeezed tightly in return. “Have fun, ok?”

“Yeah I will.” I said giving her another tight squeeze.

“Juliet and Miky are cool.” Tina said giving me her approval. “Miky is so cute.”

“Yeah,” I agreed.

“Too bad he’s not into girls,”

“Yeah, bummer,” I said “maybe he is….maybe he’s bi” I said

“Yeah, maybe,” Tina said her smile never leaving her face. I knew she was just trying to be strong for me. Once Tina and I start crying we can’t stop.

James came over, “Can I steal my girl for a bit?” MY heart sank to my toes. “She’s mine!” Tina said giggling before giving me a quick kiss on my cheek before rejoining Juliet, Miky, Aasher and Abriana.

“So, Aasher is a cool guy,” James said casually.

“Yeah,” I said looking out the window.

“I’m going to miss you.” James whispered in my ear.

“Me too.” I said as I tried hard to focus on the tail of a plane. “Give your mom my love and tell her that I’m still rooting for her and I know she’ll make it” I clenched my jaw as I felt the tears welling up in my eyes.

“I will,” James said wiping the tears from my cheek. “Just don’t cry ok?”

“I’m trying.” I whispered attempting to stop the tears, but failed.

“I know and I’m really proud of you.” James said smiling at me lovingly.

“Why?” I asked confused.

“Being the strong, amazing and beautiful person you are.” James whispered to me silently leaning in, closing the distance between us so our faces were touching.

“I love you no matter what,” James said leaning in to kiss me. ‘This is it, our final kiss’ I thought causing more tears to fall. I felt the warmth of James’ lips on me, as the tears streamed down my face. I didn’t want the moment to end, ever.

I wanted to freeze time, if I couldn’t have that I wanted to somehow have this feeling forever but the impossible is called impossible for a reason. It was something I would have to accept. We slowly pulled away James gaze completely focused on me. I could see so many unsaid thoughts just by looking at James’s face that is how well I knew him.

Moving on from this was going to be hard, but I have to. James’ expression wavered slightly I looked behind me and saw Aasher’s face harden and then relax before he turned away. What James did next was totally unexpected. “Aasher?” James called successfully getting Aasher’s attention. Aasher walked over to us, my heart started to race.

Never the Same – Chapter 3 – Complications

I woke up feeling someone beside me, wondering who it was I turned my head slowly as to not wake the person up. Abriana was lying down wake the person up. Abriana was lying down next to me, her hand intertwined in mine. I smiled a sad smile remembering yesterday when I came home. I ran up to my room right away, the tears streaming down my face. Abriana came in after comforting me, telling me that I had made the right choice saying I was being completely selfless.

I slowly let go of Abriana’s hand, slowly getting off my bed as to not wake her up. I quickly grabbed my robe and went to take a shower. The shower was very refreshing, I felt different in the water, and I felt free. The steamy water hitting my back, the cool shampoo in my hair; it made me feel like a different person.

When I finished my shower I quietly walked in to my room carefully closing the door to my bathroom. When I turned around I saw Abriana stirring awake. “Morning,” I said trying to sound upbeat.

“Morning” Abriana said, her voice raspy “how are you feeling?”

“Okay considering…” I said trailing off knowing she would understand.

“Good,” Abriana said as I turned around, “how’d you sleep?”

“Comfortably,” I said as I turned to look at her “Ri?” I said trying to get Abriana to look at me.

“Yah?”

“Thanks for staying with me last night.”

“Of course!” Abriana said “oh and Aud?”

“Yeah?” I said facing away from her putting on my underwear.

“Make sure to wear something cute and smart, you want to make a good first impression.” Abriana said winking as she left my room.

“I will!” I yelled so she could hear me.

After trying on half my closet I settled on a pair of royal blue jean pants,  a white lace sweater knitwear top, silver metallic ballet flats, white feather earrings, and the TAKEN bracelet that James gave me. I sat down at my dresser to make my hair. I took my Rose headband placing it right where my hairline starts adding a bit of bohemian style to my comfortable look. I analyzed myself in the mirror, smoothing out  the bottom of my hair my hair. Ok’I thought ‘I’m ready!’

When I walked down stairs Michel, Sharon and Abriana were sitting there talking. I realized they hadn’t touched the food that Esperanza made; I felt a pang of guilt. “Were you waiting for me?” I said raising an eyebrow.

“Of course we were Hun,” Dad said patting the empty chair beside him.

“Sorry!” I said as I sat down analyzing all the food. There were three types of eggs; scrambled, sunny side up (my favorite) and poached there was bread, cream cheese, and coffee.

“Why are you sorry? This is our last breakfast with you for the next five months!” mom said smiling sadly at me.

“Okay let’s eat,” Abriana said breaking the sad mood. I threw her a grateful look, and she winked back. I knew that Michel and Sharon loved me, they often said so, but I didn’t think that they would actually be this sad about me leaving. I smiled to myself feeling a bit happier than before.

There was a knock at the door. “I invited Tina for breakfast, I hope that’s okay.” Mom said looking at me cocking her head to the side  look. I nodded my approval.

“Of course!” I said getting up to get the door, “Hey!” I said to Tina who was leaning against the threshold.

“Hey babe,” Tina said giving me a tight hug. We walked back to the kitchen talking about my plans for today.

“Tina!” Abriana said jumping up to hug her.

“Hey!” Tina giggled as she hugged Abriana. “Hey Mr. and Mrs. Kent!” Tina said in a good mood as usual.

“Hey Hun,” Mom said trying to balance a plate in one hand while hugging Tina.

“Ina! How are you” Dad said calling Tina by the pet name he gave her when we were about six.

“Awesome Mr. Kent!” Tina said high-fiving Dad’s outstretched hand.

“So your plane leaves at five o’clock, we have to be there at around three.” Mom said before drinking from her coffee cup. “Right?” She said uncertainly, she looked like she was trying to calculate the amount of time we would need.

“Yup,” Dad and I said in unison. I grinned at him and he pinched my check lightly.

“Ouch!” I said pretending to pout and rub me cheek.

“So are you done packing?” Mom inquired.

“Yah I just have to throw a couple of more things in, you know like last minute packing and then I will be done.”

“Aud pass me the eggs,” Dad said pointing to what the large egg plate.

“Sure thing,” I said getting up to make sure the plate didn’t drop.

After we were done dinner Abriana, Tina, and I went upstairs to finish packing,

“Did you check the weather?” Tina asked as she sat down on my bed.

“Good idea!” I said plopping down next to her. I Google searched the weather report in Australia; the report came up saying it would be sunny and warm weather.

“I should pack a bathing suit, right?” I asked both Abriana and Tina.

“Duh!” Abriana said while Tina shook her head in disapproval. I walked over to mu spring and summer (yes, I have a separate dresser for summer and winter,) and pulled out my black bikini. “Just one bathing suit?” Abriana said cocking her head to the side.

“How many should I bring?” I inquired turning back to my dresser.

“Like five!” Tina said raising her prefect eye-brow. I pulled out four more. “Don’t forget that!” Tina said pointing to my towel dress.

“Riiiiight” I said pulling it out as well.

“MUSIC!” Abriana said running to my IHome and connecting her IPod to it. “Any requests?” Abriana said turning around flashing her adorable grin.

“Fight for This Love by Cheryl Cole?” I said shrugging while putting my bathing suits in one of my suitcases.

We started bobbing along to the music

“Too much of anything can make you sick,

Even the good can be a curse,

Makes it hard to know which road to go down,

Knowing too much can get you hurt,

Is it better is it worse?

Are we sitting in reverse?

Is just like were going backwards,

I know where I want this to go,

Driving fast but let’s go slow,

What I don’t want to do is crash no,

Just know that you’re not in this thing alone,

There’s always a place in me that you can call home,

Whenever you feel like were growing apart let’s just go back, back, back, back, back to the start,

Anything that’s worth having,

Sure enough is worth fighting for,

Quitting’s out of the question,

When it get tough gotta fight some more,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

If it’s worth having its worth fighting for,

Now every day ain’t ‘gon be no picnic,

Love ain’t no walk in the park,

All you can do is make the best of it now,

Can’t be afraid of the dark,

 

Just know that you’re not in this thing alone,

There’s always a place in me that you can call home,

Whenever you feel like were growing apart let’s just go back, back, back, back, back to the start,

Anything that’s worth having,

Sure enough is worth fighting for,

Quitting’s out of the question,

When it get tough gotta fight some more,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

If it’s worth having its worth fighting for,

I don’t know where were heading,

I’m willing and ready to go,

We’ve been driving so fast,

We just need to slow down and just role

Anything that’s worth having,

Sure enough is worth fighting for,

Quitting’s out of the question,

When it get tough gotta fight some more,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

If it’s worth having its worth fighting for

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love,

If it’s worth having its worth fighting for….”

 

I finished packing with Tina and Abriana’s help – of course. We had an hour to spare so I laid down on my bed singing along to “Total Eclipse of the Heart by     ”

“Turn around,

Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you’re never coming around,

Turn around,

Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears,

Turn around,

Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by…..”

 

“You ready?” James texted me interrupting my trio with Tina and Abriana.

“Yah we just finished packing”

“We?” James asked confused

“Abriana, Tina and I,” I quickly write back, it was like everything was normal, that I hadn’t completely shattered his heart that we hadn’t had a break up talk, even though we weren’t really broken up because James said that  he didn’t want to make it official until I left.

“Oh, right of course, hahaha”

“Yup, well can you blame them? I’m leaving! 😥 I wrote back smiling sadly

“Why are you smiling? Who are you texting?”

“James,” I said completely oblivious to anything other than what was going on the screen of my phone.

“I didn’t forgetL” James said, I could just imagine him pouting. My heart ached I wanted to see him badly.

“Are you going to come over or are you going to meet us at the airport?” I asked anxiously

“Whatever you want,” James wrote back almost immediately

“Come now, I wana hang out before I go, just the four of us, if that’s ok” I wrote hesitantly

“I’m coming” James replied

“Ok see you soon,” I wrote back but I never got a reply because James was probably in his car already.

“James is coming now,” I told Tina and Abriana, in response Tina grabbed my left hand, Abriana following her lead, grabbed my right hand squeezing it tightly. I loved this just sitting here with my girls doing nothing it made me feel calm. I knew they were here for me, after all I could feel them but the silence allowed me to think, even thought there was music in the background, some things would never change.

I heard a knock on my door. “Come in!” Abriana called out breaking the silence.

“Hey,” James said closing the door behind him.

“Hi!” I said getting off the bed to greet him. James opened his arms and as if we weren’t going to be broken up soon, as if the world wasn’t ending, as if all was ok, I hugged him back. “Hey,” James whispered into my ear. “Hey,” I whispered back while burying my head into his hair, it smelled so good, James always smelled good no matter what. I looked up at him lost in his eyes, I couldn’t hear anything, and I was oblivious to everything except James. I leaned up to him as he leaned down kissing me softly on my lips. I looked up at him and smiled his eyes were sad but he was smiling, “what’s wrong?” I asked. “Audrey Kent, you are the most beautiful woman I know,” James said before kissing my cheek. I blushed and said thank you. We turned walking to my bed to find Tina and Abriana gossiping about nothings. I laughed loving these moments that made my life so normal, normal is what I loved, but I was anything but normal.

Never the Same – Chapter 2 – I Will Love You Forever

I hate packing; it brought back so many undesirable feelings. It felt as if I was leaving something or someone; which I was, I was leaving the only place I felt comfortable and safe. I was leaving the people I called my family. All I felt was sheer emptiness, which scared me. I felt as if I was tree years old again, back in the orphanage, the only place I called home, were my “family” was. I know I was just three and it’s a lot to remember considering my younger age, but it affected me greatly.

Now my home is here with Sharon, Michel, and Abriana my family and with my friends who really care about me. For five months I have to leave them, I have to leave the place I feel secure, the place I called home.

I sat down on my bed and pulled out my laptop from my personalized case. I Google Searched ‘Australian THT (teens helping teens) Program’ and the first thing that came on was a now purple link due to the fact that I had clicked on it so  many times. When the page popped up I moved my mouse over to the link that said ‘Joining the Group’ and found a long list of people including myself. Curious to see who would be joining me, I scrolled down there were names that stuck out at me like Amelia, Sammy, Quinn, Sofia, Luke, Mimi, Carlos, Tom and the list went on.

There was a sudden knock at my door. “Come in” I called out.

“Hey,” Mom said “What are you up to?” she said referring to my attempt at packing.

“I’m trying,” I sighed closing my laptop and getting off my bed. Mom looked at me studying my face.

“If you don’t want to go, you don’t have to, you know that right?” Mom said sitting on my bed and patting a space next to her.

“I know, and I want to go, but I just wish James would be coming with me.”

“Yah, but honey, it’s going to work out, don’t worry.” Mom said rubbing my back and pulling me close, “and look at the bright side if Marie gets better that director said it would be okay for James to join late.”

“Mom, should I tell James we should take a break until I get back? I mean I don’t want him to feel like he’s trapped while I’m away, I mean its five months after all.” I was relived to finally relay my long pondered thought.

“I think you should do whatever you feel is best for your relationship,” Mom said squeezing my shoulder.

“Thanks Mom,” I said hugging her tightly.

“I’m always here for you Aud, you know that, right?” Mom inquired returning my hug.

“Yah I know.”

After Mom left I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed James’ number. “Hey babe,” James voice made my heart ache, knowing what I was going to do to him, the guy that always stood beside me, the guy that I always sought comfort in, I was going to hurt that guy and it  made me feel horrible, more horrible than I had ever felt.

“Can we meet?” I asked James.

“Yah, let me ask Rita if I can take my lunch break early.” I heard murmuring from the other end. “Where do you want to meet?”

“Lake Side,” I said referring to our usual spot.

“Should I pick up lunch?” James asked thoughtfully, ‘that’s one of the many things I love about him.’ I thought to myself. I felt a pang of guilt, why did I have to do this? ‘I have to because it’s the right thing to do.’ I was once again having internal conflict; I couldn’t handle it any longer.

“Sure,” I said “you know what I want right?”

“Don’t I always?” James stated I heard the way his voice said always and I could just imagine that faint smile of his creeping up his mouth. ‘Not for long’ I thought sadly.

“I’ll see you,” I said quickly before I hung up.

I took my bag and sweater before walking over to Abriana’s room which was down the hall from mine. “Hey,” I said after I knocked and opened the door.

“Hey,” Abriana said looking up from her laptop.

“I’m going out for a bit, tell Mom ok?”

“Ok,” Abriana said cocking her head to the side as she always did when she got quizzical. “Are you okay?” She put her laptop next to her on her bed and sat up letting me know I had her full attention.

“Just be here when I get back, I’m going to need you.” I told her knowing I would need her comfort and support.

“Ok,” Abriana said not pressing the matter farther. Abriana lifted her hand to her mouth ‘throwing me a kiss.’

“Thanks,” I said quickly holding up my hand as if to catch the kiss before closing the door and running down stairs. Ever since Abriana and I were little we had a silent way of saying I love you. Just doing that simple motion made me feel that it might just be ok, despite what I was about to do.

The cold hit me hard, shivering I pulled my coat around me tightly while running to my car. Thankfully there wasn’t a lot of traffic on the way to Lake Side so I got there in half the time I usually did, which I was grateful for because I was already starting to get my bad feeling again.

When I arrived James was already there sitting on ‘our’ bench with the food; looking as perfect as usual. Seeing James made my heart flutter more than usual, therefore before I got out I quickly prepared myself so I wouldn’t completely flip out and have a mental break down. “Hey!” James said walking over and giving me a kiss. I enjoyed each moment it, savoring the superlative feeling I got. I felt horrible for enjoying the moment, but I had to it may have been the last I would ever have with James and I wanted it to be a good one.

I grabbed James’ hand and rand with him to our usual bench; it had the best view of all the other benches. You could see the whole lake in all its beauty. I felt James’ hand on the small of my back; as a reflex I leaned into him, feeling secure in his embrace, never wanting the moment to end.

Suddenly I got up and ran along the edge of the lake, looking back at James letting him know to follow. “Where are you going?” James yelled in confusion.

“Come and see!” I smirked.

I ran with all I had in me until I got to the other side of the lake. I let myself fall under the willow tree; suddenly I felt tears spring from my eyes. I broke down crying uncontrollably. I felt James kneel down beside me pulling me into his lap. “What’s wrong?” James asked with worry, “Are you hurt?

“N-n-no,” I managed through sobs.

“So what is it?” James said as his grip tightened on me.

“I-I’m a horrible person” I blurted out.

“What?” James asked muddled.

“I’m a-“

“No, I know what you said” James said cutting me off, “you’re not a horrible person.”

“I am, and you are going to hate me.” I insisted

“Why?” James asked now completely baffled.

“Because, “I said as tears welled up in my eyes “I-I” I sat up gasping for air. “I think we should take a break for now until I get back.” I started sobbing again as James pulled me back into his embrace.

“Shhhh, shhhh, shhhh,” James lulled in a soothing voice.

After about ten minutes of crying and James soothing voice trying to make me calmed down, James finally succeeded. We sat in silence until I was able to control my emotions again. “You hate me, don’t you?” I asked sadly.

“I don’t,” James said locking his gorgeous hazel eyes with mine.

“Don’t hide it, I know you do,” I insisted.

“Al’s I really don’t! I love you no matter what!”

“Really?” I asked shocked.

“Absolutely! You were there for me every minute my mom was sick and you still are! You stood next to me at my worst points, and I see how much this hurts you. Of course it hurts me as well, but honestly I was going to suggest the same thing, I just didn’t know how to do it.”

“Well, you’re an amazing guy and you have always been there for me, that’s why this hurts more than anything in the world.” I said taking the tissue  James offered me.

“Don’t worry Al’s. Go to Australia, have fun and when you get back we’ll talk about our relationship, okay?” I nodded my head, not trusting myself to speak.

“Do you want me there tomorrow?” James asked referring to seeing me off at the airport as we had planned.

“Yes,” I said gratefully.

James pulled me up and kissed me. “Were not over yet,” James said his adorable grin creeping up his lips with a hint of sadness. I kissed him back nodding my head in agreement. We took our time walking back to our cars watching the sun getting ready to set.

When we got to my car, I quickly hopped inside and waited for James to leave but he was taking his time cleaning the food we hadn’t eaten. I decided to leave because I couldn’t wait for James to leave first. I started my Jeep and drove home with tears springing from my eyes.